Lie after Lie

Liars. These are the people that everyone hates, but we all lie. Some of us lie to get out of something, some of us lie to make other people feel good, and some of us lie because we are full of shit human beings with nothing better to do. These are the people I deal with everyday at work.

Captain Dick

Early on when I started working at the hotel I was working my normal Friday/Saturday night shifts. This one Friday I had another cheater come in with some ho. I checked him in as normal and then he went on to his room and gave that ho the best 5 minutes of her  life.

Apparently the next day he told my boss that when I checked him in I shouted out his address, credit card number and room number like I had Tourette Syndrome. WHAT??? None of that shit happened. By law we can't say room numbers out loud, I can't see the entire card number on file and what would be the purpose behind me doing all that shit? My boss knew he was full of shit but there is no point to lie about that. He didn't get anything out of it, his rate wasn't decreased, I wasn't fired and his ho wasn't satisfied.

SandWOman

Not too long ago I had a woman come down to the front desk to tell me that she hadn't slept the whole night because there was sand in her bed. She wanted a discount. I don't give discounts easily, I asked her to explain.

SandWOman: I didn't sleep because there was black sand all over my bed.
Working Girl: Black sand? On the 3rd floor?
SandWOman: Yes. I had 2 queen beds and there was sand all in the bed closest to the window. My son slept fine because he was in the other bed but I didn't sleep at all.
Working Girl: Why didn't you come down to the front desk, we could've gotten you another room.
SandWOman: It was midnight; it was too late for that.
Working Girl: Krizzle (the shift manager), can you go check her room?

She goes to check and comes back to tell me that the sand is not black, there is a very small sprinkling of sand in the middle of the bed and that sand is now in BOTH of the beds when she claimed it was only one. How dare she come in here and not only lie but place sand in BOTH of the beds. What a simple bitch. Get your lies straight if that is what you're going to do. If you claim black sand, I better damn well see black sand. If you claim a whole beach full, then it better not look like it was scooped up with a thimble. I gave her a 10 dollar discount because she looked like hot garbage on a summer day.

After that she went and ate ass loads of the free breakfast and changed her baby's diaper on the hood of her car. Simple Trash.

Bloody Monday

This was similar to Sand Bitch. This guest came down and claimed that there was blood on the sheets of her bed. Again, we wondered why she didn't come down to the front desk.

Dumb Dumb: Well, we checked in really late so we were very tired and didn't check the sheets. We just got straight in bed.
Working Girl: So you checked in, went upstairs. didn't turn on the lights, didn't change out of your clothes, you just got in bed somehow knowing to pull back the blankets without any light?
Dumb Dumb: Yes.

I told my front desk agent and housekeeping manager to go check the room. They came back laughing because they claimed it looked as if an animal was slaughtered and the animal bled ketchup. This Dumb Dumb squirted ketchup all over the sheets and claimed it was blood. Safe to say she did not get a discount.

Corporate Account

This happened very recently. I received a phone call from a woman who claimed that her company filled out a corporate account sheet and it was agreed upon by the hotel that her company would get a rate of $73. When she looked at the credit card statement she was charged $148.

Lying Ass Bitch: Hi, I called the corporate offices and opened a case with with them, they were supposed to contact you then contact me but I never got a response. We filled out a corporate account form for a $73 dollar rate and was charged $148.
Working Girl: I let the corporate offices know that there is no corporate account form and the corporate account rate is $129.
Lying Ass Bitch: We filled one out for $73.
Working Girl: There isn't anything to fill out. There is no form of that nature, all corporate accounts go through me and we have never had a rate of $73.
Lying Ass Bitch: Are you new?
Working Girl: Nope. Been working here for 3 years.
Lying Ass Bitch: 3 YEARS? Well I guess we'll take our business elsewhere.

*Click*

I laughed because what this woman didn't know was that her toothless husband had drunkenly stumbled into the hotel a few nights before and revealed that he filled out a business lead sheet so that his mother in-law (Lying Ass Bitch's mother) could stay here at a cheaper rate. They are not a business; they just live up the street with no room for her sleep there.

These aren't the first and definitely not the last group of people to lie. But these are the people with the most creativity to make up the shit that they made up.