Homeless Pt. 1

Anytime you work anywhere there is a chance that a homeless person will wander in. This happens quite a bit at the hotel. I think it's because it looks so peaceful and quiet that they feel as if they won't be bothered. The problem is, the hotel is not a hang out spot. People can't just kick it in the hotel. If every homeless person just wanted to sit for 20 minutes, we wouldn't have a problem...but they never just want to sit, they've always gotta do something weird.

Mind's Playing Tricks On Him

I was at work once when this guy comes in dressed in a dirty suit and hat. He has between two and three teeth, a wandering eye and he is extremely loud. He strutted right up to the front desk and puts a dollar on the counter.

Bushwick: Can I get four quarters?
Working Girl: Sure.

I exchange the dollar for four quarters.

Bushwick: Can I get a dollar bill?
Working Girl: Um...okay.

I then exchange the four quarters I gave him for dollar he had given me originally.

This went on for another two minutes. We were just exchanging the same four quarters and same dollar bill over and over again. I finally had to put an end to it.

Working Girl: You know what, I'm out. You've got all my money.
Bushwick: Okay. Thank you.

He then walks up to a guest sitting in the lobby on the computer.

Bushwick: JERRY BROWN IS TRYING TO KILL ME!

Guy: Okay then. Have a nice day.

Bushwick then leaves but as he's leaving he's shouting "JERRY BROWN IS TRYING TO KILL ME!" over and over again.

Side Note: I call him Bushwick because he reminded me of Bushwick Bill from the Geto Boys. If you don't know the Geto Boys, YouTube "Mind Playing Tricks on Me." Also, Jerry Brown is the governor of California. I have no idea why he'd want to kill Bushwick, Jerry Brown seems like an okay guy.

Helpful

Again, when you see a nicely furnished building but no people are inside that you can see, you become nosy. I was at work on a Saturday when I heard a noise coming from the kitchen/dining room. There were no other employees there besides myself. I went to go see which non-reading guest ignored the 'Employees Only' sign again and walked into the kitchen. When I arrive, I see a homeless man playing with the silverware. He's actually rearranging it. He's putting the knives where the spoons go, the spoons where the forks are supposed to be, etc.

Working Girl: HEY! What are you doing?
Crazy: I'm just being helpful.
Working Girl: Well thanks but you've got to go.
Crazy: Okay.

He then left and I put all of the silverware in the dishwasher. I'm sure he meant no harm by what he was doing but it was so weird. Did he pull that excuse out of his ass or did he really think he was being helpful? I'll never know.

Starving Artist

This happened rather recently. I walked to the dining area to get myself some tea. I take five minutes to make my tea. When I'm finally done making my tea, I turn to the right and see a foot. I follow the foot and it is attached to the leg of a homeless guy sitting on the floor, in the corner of the room coloring. I couldn't believe it so I asked for a second opinion.

I called my front desk agent and asked her to walk to the dining room and tell me if she sees something. She didn't see him at first so she didn't know why I asked her to do that. Then she saw him.

Amles: What the hell?
Working Girl: Right? So I'm not tripping out. You see him too?
Amles: What is he doing? Is he drawing? What is this? He can't do that here.
Working Girl: Excuse Me (to the guy), you're not a guest here.
Artist: No.
Working Girl: Then I can't have you hanging out in my lobby.
Artist: I was just coming in here to finish my work.
Working Girl: I understand that but I'm sorry if you're not an employee or a guest here, I can't have you in the hotel.
Artist: WELL LET ME FINISH MY COLORING FIRST!
Working Girl: Bro...NO!

He left very upset.

I honestly have no words for this.